How Everyday Metaphors Help You Connect and Influence

Do you think metaphors belong in English class or literary writing?

No… don’t be silly. Metaphors are everywhere. Everyone’s speech is already full of them. And most people have a few themes that appear more than others - sports, food, journeys, weather, construction, animals.

My take on metaphors is that it’s not about inventing clever metaphors yourself; it’s about noticing the metaphors people around you use and then choosing the metaphors you use on purpose.

When you use metaphors that the person you’re talking to uses, something magical happens. You connect faster with them. They feel like you get them.

And the funny thing is that they’re hard-pressed to say why. It’s so subtle, they don’t really realize what’s going on. They just feel like you’re easy to talk to. 

I’ve thrown together a list of metaphors that come up often and sorted them into 12 themes.

Listen for them. Use them. Add to your list. And see what happens in your relationships. 

And don’t forget to take notes - Bob uses sports metaphors, Lucy uses battle metaphors, etc, so you can be better prepared for your next conversation.

1) Sports

• Let’s keep our eye on the ball and focus on what really matters.

• Sarah really hit it out of the park with her presentation.

• We need a clear game plan before we move forward.

2) Food and cooking

• I don’t want to go into the meeting with a half‑baked idea. Let’s think it through more. 

• Paul really knows how to stir the pot, doesn’t he?

• I expect everyone to bring something to the table, so we can have a good discussion.

3) War and battle

• Sorry, but this is where I have to hold the line. It’s a legal requirement.

• We’re fighting an uphill battle on this one.

• We can’t afford to be under fire again for the same issue.

4) Travel and journey

• After the last false start, we need to get back on track.

• Let’s check in on how we’re doing on our milestones.

• We need to navigate this change carefully, step by step.

5) Building and construction

• Let’s construct a compelling case for getting more funding for this project.

• We need to tear down the barriers between quality and other departments.

• I think our success here will depend on how we frame the issue.

6) Weather and storms

• We’ve weathered the storm often enough to know we’ll be fine.

• I want to start this meeting, by clearing the air. 

• When the pressure builds, we’ve got to stay calm and not react impuslively.

7) Nature and growth

• Now’s the time to plant the seeds of this idea.

• This is a really thorny issue. Let’s handle it carefully.

• Michael is really beginning to grow into his role.

8) Machines and mechanics

• Our system works like well‑oiled machine.

• Let’s fine‑tune the process.

• We should probably calibrate expectations so we’re all on the same page.

9) Maps and navigation

• We need a clear roadmap. 

• This change is uncharted territory. We’ll be learning as we go.

• If we don’t adjust our course, we’ll end up repeating the same mistakes. 

10) Music and performance

• Not sure our teams are in harmony when it comes to expectations.

• The message is good, but needs to be fine-tuned a bit.

• Let’s play it by ear and see how it goes.

11) House and home

• If we don’t keep the house in order, small issues become big ones.

• Let’s open the door to honest feedback on the process.

• Before we start, let’s take care of some housekeeping.

12) Animals

• Trying to align everyone on this feels like herding cats.

• I don’t think we can ignore the elephant in the room any longer.

• She’s got an eagle eye for anything that impacts quality. 

The idea is not to memorize these things. The idea is to start listening for them. And then identify who uses what. You'll notice patterns and themes very quickly.

If Bob is always talking about hitting an idea out of the park, then sprinkle some other sports metaphors into your conversation when you’re talking with him. That’s his language.

The magic is that he’ll feel heard by you. And we like people who make us feel heard, so he’ll like you. And we trust people we like, so he’ll trust you. 

This doesn’t happen overnight. 

But it doesn’t happen at all if you don’t start paying attention. 

If you’re getting a lot of resistance and you’ve realized you need to pay more attention to your relationships and communication, and you’d like help with that, book a time on my calendar. Book here

Click here to join my email list to get my content straight to your inbox.